theinfernaldevices:

schamlos:

theinfernaldevices:

on december 21st we all should just agree on a time to drop to the ground and pretend to be dead

I’m pretty sure that world ending doesn’t work like that

i’m sorry how many apocalipses have you experienced???

We should just lay there for 5 minutes and watch everyone without tumblr run around screaming.

(Source: barbarajoangordon, via laughingstation)

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My dad is clipping him nails in the other room and I took a bite if my Doritos and he stopped so I stopped and it became really quiet.

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vodkacupcakes:

Do you ever lay in bed and crave someones arms around you but like its not gonna happen so you want to explode

(via im-not-ofuckingk)

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A apple a day keeps everyone away if you throw it hard enough

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mojosodope178:

“trust fall”
“DAMN IT JOE”


thIS JUST MADE MY DAY

starinhercorner:

Alternative phrases to “calm your tits”:

  • soothe your boobs
  • de-stress your breasts
  • undo the calamity that is your mammaries
  • adjust your bust before it combusts

Thank you for your time

(Source: martianwitchery, via gingerblivet)

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Reblog this and see what you get.
  • 1: You’re ugly.
  • 2: I hate your tumblr.
  • 3: I love your tumblr.
  • 4: You’re my Tumblr crush.
  • 5: Your Tumblr is amazing.
  • 6: You’re hot.
  • 7: You’re gorgeous.
  • 8: You’re pretty.
  • 9: I want your number.
  • 10: I’m on your blog often.
  • 11: I want you.
  • 12: You're lovely.
  • 13: You're fucking sexy.
  • 14: I want to hug you.
  • 15: Let me love you.
  • 16: Hit me up
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